DIY: being less slovenly

Well, I've been trying a new look lately, in on e of my previous posts I mentioned that uber-douche Spencer Pratt has a horrendous looking beard that makes mine look kept, so, seeing as how I doubt he's gonna shave his on my behest, I decided to shave mine. Yes, I know, Sampson cut his hair. Brett Myers did the same and his ERA is hovering around 5.54, bad example I know, especially heading into the NHL playoffs where you're not only encouraged to grow a beard, It's considered bad luck if you don't. My point is this, I realize the potential for me to be a starting pitcher in the majors isn't good, almost non existent seeing as how my fastball is slower than most pitcher's change-ups. Looking like I just got off of the Island from Lost wont get me a date anytime soon.

Also, wearing basketball shorts and t-shirts you get for free from jobs/events do not make for a very presentable person, I own more shorts made out of some mesh/polyester material than I do normal shorts, I own clothes actually, I just save them for when I go out, I literally wore a wifebeater and sweatpants an entire week once. Being blissfully unaware of my appearance I realize has been a hinderance, I'm not announcing that I'm gonna make the complete transformation into the hipster douche (I own a mac, wear new era hats and jackets, I used to own a sidekick before I traded it in for a G1)...... am I too late?